Vacation from a Vacation
Whenever I talk to other adults who haven't been to Disney World since they were kids (or at all), I like to point out that it's so much better as an adult. One of the reasons for this that I like to cite is that when you're an adult you actually have something to take a vacation from. Work. Stress. Bills. The general realities of life as an adult. Escaping it all makes the trip to Disney that much sweeter.
That's not to say that kids can't or don't enjoy Disney World, or that they don't have their own stresses to deal with. Just that as an adult it feels like the escape from those stresses is much easier to appreciate and enjoy.
That's probably why I started to go so much over the last two and half years. I had a job that was time consuming and stressful but ultimately unfulfilling, I had a hobby that was fulfilling but not really going anywhere, and for the first time I had the disposable income to escape both a few times a year. Honestly, those vacations were life savers.
When Kat and I went down this past January I had been self-employed for a grand total of about 10 days. So needless to say I was still in a state of transition. At that point I was actually stressing more than usual because I had just spent a month training my replacement at work while also working on bonus videos for while I was gone, and also sorting out all of the details of leaving my job (such as health insurance, taxes, finances, etc.) So while I had already left the job that was high stress and low satisfaction, I still really appreciated having the vacation.
Now I've been at it for about four months. I'm far from being safely in the territory of making a career out of this, but at this point I've gotten over the stress and uncertainty of not having a steady 9-5. I've overcome the deep fear I had that in which I would turn out to be a lazy bum who wouldn't have the motivation to work on the channel with the temptation of all this new free time. I proved to myself (and the internet?) that the success of the channel wasn't some flash-in-the-pan freak occurrence that would disappear as quickly as it appeared.
In short, life is pretty awesome right now. I'm enjoying every day of it because I know full-well it might not be the same a year or two from now.
So with my day-to-day becoming a dream come true, I guess I shouldn't be surprised to realize that this latest Disney trip felt less like an escape than the others. I wasn't running away from daily stress, and I think that resulted in less of a contrast and in turn less of a feeling of escapism. Of course that's not a bad thing. I still enjoyed Disney plenty. It just wasn't the needed break from my regular life that I once needed.
All that to say, after looking at my 2018 and 2019 plans, I realized that I might not make it back to Disney World for a proper vacation until late 2019. It's partially due to timing issues and mostly due to financial reasons. I'm trying to get this whole thing off the ground as a career, and that doesn't really call for multiple trips to Disney a year.
Now a year ago, that long of a wait between trips would have been a serious bummer. But now? I actually really don't mind. By Friday I was actually looking forward to coming home because I was so eager to get back into writing, editing, and working on stuff like D&D. Ultimately, I feel less of a need for vacations because now it feels like I'm living one.
Of course if the channel balloons even more this summer and that sweet sweet AdSense moola comes pouring in, maybe I'll work in one more short trip at the end of the summer. I swear I can stop at any time!